My kind of cookies

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My Goate is not stupid!

A car with Stains

It’s a new moon

A test confirms it, AC-DC ROCK!

Single does not equal Available

Good security question

Those purchasing a vehicle at Max Motors in Butler Missouri will receive an AK-47 assault rifle with their purchase during the month of August.

This is the second consecutive year the dealership has given away vouchers for a firearm as part of a sales promotion.

The logo at Mark Muller’s dealership is a nod to his feelings about guns – with an old west caricature pointing two pistols at those who pass by. He said it’s a nod to what he calls “big city” ways.

“We really are different than the big city dealers,” Muller said.

The actual promotion gives those who buy a vehicle a voucher redeemable at a gun shop for the $450 dollars it costs to get an AK-47.

“That way it separates you from anything bad that could happen,” Muller said. “We’ll put it in the hands of professionals who do this every day.”

The AK-47 ups the ante on a promotion Muller did last year, giving away vouchers for the price of the Caltec pistol. Muller proudly shows off the same pistol he carries in his pocket.

“We already did handguns,” Muller said. “Let’s do something more fun — AKs. You ever shot an AK? Oh, they’re a blast.”

Muller said he knows people are bound to be bothered by the promotion, even in his small city locale, people like Gabe Johnston.

“I would not encourage people to get an AK-47,” Gabe Johnston, of Jasper, Mo., said. “I’m fine with a rifle. But maybe not assault rifles … I don’t see the purpose of those guns.”

Muller said the purpose of any gun is protection — and at Max Motors, selling cars. “We get a lot of press out of these kind of promotion,” Muller said. “We sell a lot of cars. And we have a lot of fun.”

Muller says last year’s promotion, which also offered the option of $250 gas cards, sold 35 more cars than usual.

This year’s promotion is guns only, though Muller said customers can spend the voucher on a less expensive model, like a hunting rifle, or towards a more expensive one, like an AR-15 if they wanted to buy American.

One Colorado woman’s love for tofu has been judged X-rated by state officials. Kelly Coffman-Lee wanted to tell the world about her fondness for bean curd by picking certain letters for her SUV’s license plate. Her suggestion for the plate: “ILVTOFU.”

But the Division of Motor Vehicles blocked her plan because they thought the combination of letters could be interpreted as profane.

Says Department of Revenue spokesman Mark Couch: “We don’t allow ‘FU’ because some people could read that as street language for sex.”

Officials meet periodically to ensure state plates stay free of letters that abbreviate gang slang, drug terms or obscene phrases.

The 38-year-old Coffman-Lee says tofu is a staple of her family’s diet because they are vegan and that the DMV misinterpreted her message.

The Trunk Monkey is a revolutionary idea by Suburban Auto Group.

The Trunk Monkey Road Rage Assistant

The Trunk Monkey Tickets Negotiation

The Trunk Monkey Pediatric Edition

The Trunk Monkey Chaperon Edition

The Trunk Monkey Alien Abduction Protection System

The Trunk Monkey Vandalism Protection System

The Trunk Monkey Paramedic Edition

The Trunk Monkey Theft Retrival System

The Trunk Monkey Samurai Edition

The Trunk Monkey Office Work

The Trunk Monkey Will Do Anything to Help

Randy Lewis, Buy this Dad a Beer!

A 10-year old’s driving services were requested by 43-year old Randy Lewis (that’s actually him in the picture, he was really wearing that shirt) and Paula Elaine Evans because they were too drunk to drive themselves. Other passengers included another 10-year old and a 6-year old. However, the driver lost control of the van at 90MPH and flipped it, before it finally came to stop on its roof.

Thankfully, all five individuals where released from the hospital with minor injuries, and Lewis and Evans (the adults could have died for all I care) both went to jail for charges ranging from child endangerment and neglect to DUI, a charge which can be levied in Tennessee even if you aren’t behind the wheel. After a performance like that, we sincerely hope nobody ever buys that dad a beer ever again.

When the authorities arrived on the scene, Lewis admitted to having consumed at least 15 beers as well as somealcohol while Miss Evans pounded down as many unidentified pills as she could before police arrested her.

Wow, making a 10-year old drive you home because you’re wasted? That’s just sad. I think we can all agree here that designated drivers should at least be 11½. You know, so they can reach the pedals.

This is what driving in India look like. No wonder they all fail their driving courses in America.

A Chinese Chevrolet Captiva owner is angry that her SUV is going to be towed so she gets into her car, starts the engine, and begins driving off…while pulling the tow truck with her. You never know when driving a big SUV may come handy.

They are days where you should have stayed in bed. At least thank God winter is over.

This is the second scene from James Gunn’s PG Porn series.

Sasha Grey’s car is jacked up and James Gunn is the only guy who can help her.

Diamond finished Mercedes BL600 modified by D.A.D with 300,000 Swarovski crystals

Just when I thought that those Saudi douchebags lack class and taste I found what happen when you mix a Mercedes-Benz SL600 with a stupid tasteless fagot and his Bedazzler… The GAYEST CAR EVER.

Actually I’m not exactly sure that the Bedazzler could handle 300,000 Swarovski crystals, and I know it couldn’t do the Bavarian White mammoth skin seat covers.

What else can really be said about a car that’s had its cup holders replaced with pimp cup holder? If Liberace were still alive he would have just creamed his crystal jumpsuit. All it’s missing is a candelabra.

Grab your darkest sunglasses and watch the video.

You probably knows that those Saudi freaks and their money, they’re douchebags and they lack class. One way you can really appreciate what tons of money and lack of class and tastes is like; it’s by looking at some of the most absurdly chromed cars you can find.

Middle Easterners love their chrome but instead of chroming every part of the car under the hood they thought it will be flashier outside.

Caught outside the Mall of the Emirates in Dubai, this is a 100% chromed out Mercedes McLaren SLR. Look at the glass; it’s even chrome-tinted. This is a shame because a nice dark tint would look a lot better on this car.

This Ferrari 599 GTB Fiorano is special. Look how shiny it is. What’s the deal, you ask? Is that a chrome finish on there? No, the 599GTB has an all aluminum body, and if you sandblast off all the paint, and spend thousands of hours polishing aluminum, you get a badass mirror finish. Say what you will, I respect the effort.

A study commissioned by a phallically named insurance company proves beyond all doubt that the unbridled roar of an Italian supercar turns women on but the soft purr of a fuel-efficient econobox doesn’t stimulate anyone’s MPG-spot.

David Moxon subjected 40 men and women to the sounds of a Maserati, Lamborghini and Ferrari, then measured the amount of testosterone in their saliva. He found everyone had higher levels of the stuff — a measure of their arousal — after hearing the revving exotics, but the amount the women had was off the charts.

The econobox, however, left everyone colder than a January day with 4 feets of snow.

The study was commissioned by the ultra-exclusive British insurer Hiscox (I swear we’re not making this up), which was curious to know how people respond to high-end luxury cars. “We knew owners of luxury cars felt a connection with the sound of their vehicles,” says Steve Langan, managing director of the insurance company. “We have now scientifically proven the physical attraction people feel when it comes to cars.”

To test the theory that high-performance cars get people hot, Moxon had 40 men and women listen to recordings of the three Italian exotics and a Volkswagen Polo. Everyone had significantly more testosterone after hearing the exotics, and all of the women were turned on by the Maserati. The guys, on the other hand, were drawn to the Lamborghini.

“We saw significant peaks in the amount of testosterone in the body, particularly in women,” Maxon says, noting that even women who said they had no interest in cars were turned on. “Testosterone is indicative of positive arousal in the human body so we can confidently conclude from the results out today that the roar of a luxury car engine actually does cause a primeval physiological response.”

As for the Polo? Everyone had less testosterone after listening to it. That means the acceleratus interruptus of a Prius going all-electric in traffic is automotive equivalent of skin flicks starring previous secretaries of state, despite General Motors’ claim that nearly nine out of 10 women would rather talk to a guy in a hybrid than a Porsche.

That will make me slow down!