Falcon Heene the ballon “puke” boy is for me the hoax of the year. The kid was sick of lying live on national tv and utimatly got his mom and dad in jail. I wonder what’s his getting for christmas.

Posted: January 3rd, 2010 by Kat Path
Filled Under: Fucking Tastic Stories, What Grinds My Gears
With Tags: ballon boy, christmas, falcon heene, hoax, jail, puke, puke boy
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Merry Christmas

Posted: December 23rd, 2009 by Kat Path
Filled Under: Laugh Your Ass Off
With Tags: christmas, funny, lighting, merry christmas, pee, santa claus, snow
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Still wandering what to give for Christmas this year? It’s not an easy one, with the economic recession everyone is trying to work with a tight budget.

Still your kids are asking you for Guitar Hero 5 but you don’t have money? I have the PERFECT gift for you. It’s called: an Air Guitar! It’s cheap, easy to play, unbreakable, does not required batteries.

If you want to invest a bit (around 20$) you can go with a Guitar Hero Air Guitar kit.

You want to go with the Band kit? You can also have Air Drum.

If you sing, the Air Singing.

What are you waiting for? Start your Air Band now and you may end up on national TV or even in front on thousand of peoples in Finland for the World Championship.

If you can’t find any Air Guitar in your local store, you can buy it directly from me for only 1.99$ Canadian (it’s $1.87 USD)! Yes an ORIGINAL Air Guitar for only 1.99$ or the combo Air Guitar + Air Drum for only 2.99$ and the full Air Band Kit including guitar, drum, vocal and bass for a super low price of 4.99$!! FREE SHIPPING Worldwide in less then 30 seconds.

Good luck to you and Merry Christmas!

Posted: December 21st, 2009 by Kat Path
Filled Under: Hobbies, Laugh Your Ass Off, Must See Shit, Shop 'Till You Drop
With Tags: air guitar, children toy, christmas, christmas shopping, commercial, economic recession, funny, gift idea, guitar hero, guitar kit, merry christmas, perfect gift, shopping list, tight budget
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Playboy's Virgin Mary

Playboy has got into the Christmas spirit, by putting the Virgin Mary NUDE on its cover.

In its December issue model Maria Florencia Onori is featured posing in front of a stained glass window as the Virgin wearing nothing but an angelic white cloth. Its headline reads in Spanish: “We adore you, Mary.”

The December edition was published Thursday, just before the Mexican festival honoring Mary known as the Day of the Virgin of Guadalupe.

The Virgin of Guadalupe, said to have appeared to a sixteenth century Indian peasant, is Mexico’s most revered Roman Catholic figure and the annual pilgrimage to the Mexico City basilica dedicated to her is one of the world’s largest religious events.

In a statement, Chicago-based Playboy Enterprises Inc said the Mexican edition of the magazine is published by a licensee, and the company did not approve or endorse the cover.

“While Playboy Mexico never meant for the cover or images to offend anyone, we recognize that it has created offense, and we as well as Playboy Mexico offer our sincerest apologies,” the statement said.

Raul Sayrols, publisher of Playboy Mexico, said in a statement, “The image is not and never was intended to portray the Virgin of Guadalupe or any other religious figure. The intent was to reflect a Renaissance-like mood on the cover.”

Is in that a heavenly body? I hope I can spend eternity in paradise!

Posted: December 15th, 2008 by Kat Path
Filled Under: Fucking Tastic Stories, Internet is 4 Porn
With Tags: christmas, heavenly body, Maria Florencia Onori, mexico, milf, Playboy, virgin, virgin mary, virgin of guadalupe, xmas
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As a result of an overwhelming lack of requests, and with research help from a world renowned scientific journal (SPY Magazine January, 1990), I am pleased to present the results of the first truly scientific inquiry into Santa Claus.

No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.

There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn’t (appear) to handle the Muslim, Hindu, Jewish and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to to 15% of the total – 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that’s 91.8 million homes. One presumes there’s at least one good child in each.

Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding and etc.

This means that Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man- made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second – a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.

The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that “flying reindeer” (see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload – not even counting the weight of the sleigh – to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison – this is four times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth.

353,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance – this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as spacecraft re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake.

The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to centrifugal forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.

In conclusion – If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he’s dead now.

Posted: December 3rd, 2006 by Kat Path
Filled Under: Fucking Tastic Stories, Must See Shit
With Tags: child, children toy, christmas, christmas eve, flying reindeer, millions, reindeer, santa, santa claus, scientific, speed of sound, spy magazine
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