This is what can happen if you are from the Leet family and your daughter wants to go out with a Noob.

Did you know that Slow Loris loves to have its arms and belly scratched ? We didn’t even know what a slow loris was before this video but either they like having their arms scratched or they can’t put them down. Either way, this video of a slow loris being pet is really really adorable. There has been some talk that they are an endangered species but even if they aren’t, we don’t recommend getting one as a pet.

One Colorado woman’s love for tofu has been judged X-rated by state officials. Kelly Coffman-Lee wanted to tell the world about her fondness for bean curd by picking certain letters for her SUV’s license plate. Her suggestion for the plate: “ILVTOFU.”

But the Division of Motor Vehicles blocked her plan because they thought the combination of letters could be interpreted as profane.

Says Department of Revenue spokesman Mark Couch: “We don’t allow ‘FU’ because some people could read that as street language for sex.”

Officials meet periodically to ensure state plates stay free of letters that abbreviate gang slang, drug terms or obscene phrases.

The 38-year-old Coffman-Lee says tofu is a staple of her family’s diet because they are vegan and that the DMV misinterpreted her message.

Now, I’m not normally a fan of PETA. They seem to have the unique talent of taking a contested issue and holding an extreme position that can alienate most people. However, in this case I’m on PETA’s side. Their proposed Super Bowl ad, which features a bevy of beauties who are powerless to resist the temptation of veggie love, was deemed too hot for the Super Bowl by NBC. The list of complaints for the rejection includes:

• licking pumpkin
• touching her breast with her hand while eating broccoli
• pumpkin from behind between legs
• rubbing pelvic region with pumpkin
• screwing herself with broccoli (fuzzy)
• asparagus on her lap appearing as if it is ready to be inserted into vagina
• licking eggplant
• rubbing asparagus on breast

Visit Veggie Love for more details and videos

So even after we tried to warn you with our Beware the dreaded “MySpace Angles” post you’ve refused to give up on the hope that your MySpace hottie is, in fact, who she says she is. After all, she’s great, right? You two talk about EVERYTHING together through instant messenger and on the phone and you get along so well. She’s really into hearing about your ten hour long gaming marathons and doesn’t mind at all that you still live with your parents. She’s absolutely perfect. And incredibly HOT as well. After all, you’ve seen the pics to prove it.

But she still continues to shy away every time you mention meeting up face-to-face. She’s always got “that thing” going on this weekend or she’s just “oh-so-super shy” and tells you “maybe next week…or something.” So what gives, huh? It almost makes you start to wonder if…well, you know.

Yes, this is who you’ve been talking to while fapping online.

Well, far be it from us to tell you who to love. After all, beauty is only skin deep. We didn’t write the original post to be mean-spirited at all. However, we did feel it was nothing short of our civic duty to shed some light on the oh-so-pervasive phenomenon of the MySpace Angles.

It happens every day, guys. And it could be happening to you RIGHT NOW.

We also enjoyed the comments from the ladies that felt the need to let us know that guys can be just as fraudulent in their portrayal of themselves online as young women can be. While we are ecstatic to have the feedback, we are compelled to point out that it’s not necessarily a newsflash that guys lie about themselves online. Unless you really thought that we believed every anonymous poster online was six-foot-three with chiseled muscles and a bank account that would PWN Donald Trump’s. After all, there is a reason we aren’t posting pictures of ourselves here: you’d just run away from your monitors screaming only to be found hours later huddled in a corner shivering in fright.

Yeah, we know that guys lie too. But the girls are just more fun to laugh at. Sorry, ladies. But you keep on filling our inbox, ok?

So we’ve dug a little deeper and have successfully brought to you a second installment of the infamous MySpace Angles phenomenon. These lovely ladies are well aware that they don’t quite fit the mass media-portrayed, rail-thin body type of what pop culture says they are supposed to look like. But are they shying away from all the benefits that the magic of online social networking websites can bring them? Heck no, they aren’t!

These enterprising young women are working with what they got in ways that should be admired and even celebrated. They have taken a canvas that they know most shallow, modern men would pass over and skillfully turned it into a work of art that would make Monet jealous and Da Vinci horny.

So the next time you steer your browser over to MySpace, Facebook, or any other social networking or dating site, take a real close look at the lighting in those pictures. Check out that angle shot for what it really is. Because you may be staring at what may ultimately go down in history as the perfect crime. Because whether it’s you or the next guy that comes along, someone is destined to get all the lovin’ that they can handle.

So cute. So nubile. So pale. So pained, but beautiful

So where the HELL did CarrotTop come from?!?

Great smile and pretty eyes. She tells you that’s her brother beside her so you won’t be jealous

But it wasn’t her brother. It was her last dinner. And you’re next

Who doesn’t love the prim, shy librarian look?

Wow! That librarian fantasy sure fades fast in the light of day!

Ah, the requisite MySpace kissy face. So adorable

Hey, where are you going? She was gonna give you a kiss!

Cute and coy. And that shot of the "goods" is certainly an accident

Looks like there are plenty more "goods" where those came from

Nothing cuter than a little emo dreamer in the over-the-head angle shot

Oh my! Quick! Raise the camera up! Up, I say!

Black and white sad shots almost always turn out well

Moo U. semi formal pics in the light of day - not so much

This pic is all sweet. Definitely a lady you want to take home to meet mom

But the second pic is of a chick that will fight you for the last beer! Or forty ounce!

Finally, we all know that MySpace is the home of the emo hotties showing cleavage

But when the hell did it become Transylvania?!?!

So you’ve been talking to this hot young lady that you met on MySpace, Facebook, Friendster or one of the many other social networking or dating sites that are available online and you believe you have come to a point that you are ready to meet her. You get along great and have awesome conversations over the phone and on instant messenger. You listen to the same bands and have similar interests, irks, aspirations, and idiosyncrasies. In short, it really seems like you are falling for this girl.

And her pictures. “Wow” is all you can say every time that you look at them. The way that her hair falls over her shoulder as she gives you that sultry-but-oh-so-innocent look in the photo that she sent you which drives you wild. You can hardly believe that you have found a creature that is so beautiful, yet so deep and really into your interests as well. You’ve even caught yourself feeling a little sorry that you previously held the misconception that all girls that look this great are vapid and stuck up. But now you know better and you thank the internet and your computer every day while you have endless conversations with her while staring at her photo that you have now plastered onto your desktop.

You know she’s hot. You’ve shown her picture to your friends and they think she’s hot. And now you’re ready to meet her. But are you prepared for what you may actually find?

Well, let this serve as a warning to you because you may have just fallen victim to the dreaded, “MySpace Angles.”

The MySpace Angles phenomenon isn’t one that is new but is a growing concern for men, young and old, across the globe. Photography-savvy young ladies are utilizing crafty camera angles and even photo software to weave a type of black magic onto their likenesses that would rival even the most forgiving Glamour Shots photographers of the old days. These crafty ladies will bend and conform themselves precariously to just the right position to hide those multiple chins, unsightly bulges, and possibly even hooves in the attempt to rope in unsuspecting victims across the World Wide Web.

MySpace Angle

Cold, Harsh Reality

You may tell yourself that by being diligent about asking for multiple photos you are being an alarmist and maybe even paranoid. Additionally, the fact that this phenomenon exists may even appear to be mean-spirited and just plain wrong. However, we ask you while presenting this evidence to you today: Just who is at fault here? Should you feel guilty for ensuring that the package you are presented is the package you should expect? Or are you just going to hold out until the bitter end and hope for the best?

MySpace Angle Super Cutie

Larger-than-expected Dinner Date Bill

Asian Honey + Glasses = Smart and Sexy!

You’re gonna need more sake to be able to seal this deal!

Trippy little cutie that is sure to be a blast to hang out with

In reality, “little” doesn’t quite describe the trip you’re going on

A veritable Goddess at this angle

But the light of day suggests otherwise

This princess has a heart of gold and the face of an angel

But take away the soft-lighting effects of photo-editing software and another creature emerges

This is a quirky little hottie that can hang out with the guys and still be cute

Well, she can hang out with the guys, anyway. And probably drink them all under the table, to boot

The emo girl of your dreams

Or maybe your worst nightmare

And finally, one late night you asked your beauty for some boob shots

And you GOT ‘EM!

Taking a cue from Shallow Hal, love may be blind and beauty may only be skin deep but a façade of smoke and mirrors is no way to begin a relationship and if the lovely lady of your online dreams isn’t truthful with you about herself upfront, can you be so sure you can trust her down the road?

Consider this as a public service announcement to all the would-be e-Romeos out there that are trolling the social sites looking for love: watch out, because you may be biting off more than you can chew!

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

FOR EXAMPLE:

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, ‘I don’t feel like it, I just want you to hold me.’

I said, ‘WHAT??!! What was that?!’

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear…

‘You’re just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.’

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, ‘Can’t you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?’

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn’t decide which one to take, so I told her we’d just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, ‘Lets get a pair for each outfit.’

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you… she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn’t even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, ‘That’s fine, honey.’ She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, ‘I think this is all dear, let’s go to the cashier.’

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, ‘No honey, I don’t feel like it.’

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, ‘WHAT?’

I then said, ‘Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You’re just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.’

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, ‘Why can’t you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?’

Apparently I’m not having sex tonight either….but at least that bitch knows I’m smarter than her.